Have you ever been so mad you wanted to shout every vulgar and profane thing and swear against all you've known because you felt you would burst if you didn't? Have you every been so frustrated because everything you thought you knew has fallen around you in shambles? Have you ever been so violent you wanted nothing more than to rage against those that have hurt you more deeply than they could every know just hoping that they could feel some small morsel of the suffering you have gone through?
What do you do with that? How do you address this malice when it sneaks up on you unawares after what seemed like a pretty good day? Suddenly you see a picture and it shatters the barriers in your head that you built against everything you wanted to block out. You want to scream and cry and drive your fist through a wall because then your pain would be physical rather than emotional.
Such is the state I find myself in and all I want is to run away from it all.
